It's that time of year again...Fly Season. Every summer it happens. The insect level is manageable, a few flies, a few mosquitos, but nothing worth complaining about.
And then, they arrive. The flies. All together. I don't know how or why it happens, but one morning we go down to breakfast and find that the house has been invaded.
Today was that day. Literally dozens of flies were buzzing around the kitchen and living-room. It's really annoying. I mean, besides the fact that they are dirty, irritating little creatures in general, they vomit every time they land. Yeah, even when they land on the edge of your coffee cup, or alight atop your cornetto. They puke. Not a pretty thought.
I am the official fly exterminator in the family. I don't go for any smelly sprays or sticky traps. I use my trusty fly-swatter to kill 'em one by one. It's like a personal vendetta of mine. I don't like those flies and I'm going to see to it personally that they don't bother me or anyone in my house.
I'm also very accurate with the swatter. It's rare that I miss once I've chosen my prey. There's an art to it. The fly has to be on something, you'll never get it while it's flying through the air. It's best if it's perched on a flat, hard, light-colored surface. You must approach the victim with your swatter already raised and ready...any movement will alert the fly to your presence and it will buzz off somewhere else. Your swatting technique must be fast and decisive. The slightest hesitation on your part will give the little pest time to figure out what's about to hit him, and fly away.
These are just a few of the flies I axed this morning.
My sons are in awe of my fly-killing skills. They call me "007 Mamma" - you know, licensed to kill. Hey, we all have special talents...